Acts 9

I always think of Paul's road to Damascus moment as an amazing conversion, that in one moment God could even make a person with as hard of a heart as Saul convert. But in reality, Paul's road to conversion was much longer than that. Even in past chapters, we can see how God had been preparing Saul for this very moment. First of all, Paul was a student of Gamaliel (from Acts 22). This same Gamaliel was the one who prevented the Jewish counsel from crushing the apostles in Acts 5 and instead said that if this was not the will of God, it would be self-limiting. If it was the will of God, then there's no way man can overthrow it (paraphrasing...alittle). From Gamaliel's teaching, I think Paul had this same attitude. It wasn't the laws, customs, or traditions the he loved, it was God. He would follow God's ruling even if it was against everything he was taught. Second, Saul was present at Stephen's defense in Acts 7. He must've seen the peace and joy on his face even as he was persecuted. I don't care how hard-hearted he was, it must've had some kind of influence. All of these factors made Saul ready so that when God revealed himself, he would be fertile soil.

I know that for myself, I've never had a "Road to Damascus" type of conversion. It was a very slow and uneventful progression for me to realize that God was real and that I wanted Him to be my God. But I think all of us have moments in our lives where God makes Himself real. For Paul, he repeatedly mentions his conversion and experience with God in his later letters to the church. For myself, it was an experience I had with God my freshman year (ask me to share it with you one of these days if I haven't already). But these events are the moments I meditate on every time I begin to lack faith. They remind me about how real God has been in my life. Recently, I've been beginning to realize that there shouldn't only be one or a two of moments in our life that we remember. But God is making himself real to us everyday. There have been countless times when after something happens, I say to myself, "Wow, that was God!" But after a few days, I always forgot what had happened. I remember the emotion and the feeling that God did something, but what it was is hard to recollect. This might be a good time for me to actually start writing a journal to record how He has guided me in my life and how He has answered my prayer requests. It would be a great tool to use when I'm feeling spiritually weak or when I just want to remind myself of how great God is. ...mmm....okay I just convinced myself. It's decided, I'm starting one.

Lastly, I feel like I can relate to Paul a lot. In Paul's future letters, he write that he was the least of the apostles. I think he feels this way because of how he persecuted the church before being saved. I can't say that I've ever killed anyone, but before I was saved, I was a heavy atheist. When I was in school, I constantly argued with my Christian friend pointing out holes in their belief. I feel as though I may have turned more people non-Christian than Christian in my lifetime. This will be something that I'll always regret. I'm glad that by God's grace and mercy, He was able to show me the light. I only wish that I could go back and tell them how right they were, and how wrong I was. No amount of logical deductions or rigorous analysis can compare with the love, joy, comfort, and peace He gives me. Blessed be His name!